Friday, February 29, 2008

Spews On The News - March 1-3

Terrible Tory Girl Will Do Anything For Peace. Please comrades, rise against this tyrannical invention from the pits of hell - the French Horn. Not only is it named after the French fries but it produces a sound no better than spitting through a cardboard tube. Now that's what TTG calls a racket.

Losing Lie Religion

With Rowan putting his anointed feet into yet another hellish debacle of “intellect”, and apparently popping up nude in a photo of Sienna Miller according to the Sun, TTG feels age has finally caught up with the Welshman. Either that or a crisis of faith is next on the cards, St. Mark TTG’s words, if the Songs of Praise bible basher could see the light and not see Jesus, the Holy Ghost and God in it, then it’s not going to be a trial for this supposed Christian.

TTG can just imagine Rowan on knees in prayer singing REM’s classic ‘Losing My Religion’ by REM.

Watch for yourself here.

Dirty Harry : Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

The wuggle soldier, the poster-pin -up figure behind such 12 paged hero supplements in the Express and Sun, apparently is fighting the folk to stay kooked up in Afghanistan despite that the unveiling of the prince in the country has upped up Taliban efforts. (The Taliban, despite common belief, do have access to the net.)

Typical of the tabloids, the Sun relished the expose of the royal reggie, revealing his secret code name, his death count and pictures of his homebase. Responsible? Hardly.

Harry back to England. All's not lost, especially your life.

Blue Can Get It If You Really Want

Partial or non, the new Conservative campaign from the blue brightsparks at HQ is worth a look. Featuring vocals of The Jimmy Cliff, You Can Get [A Competent Government] If You Really Want - Try Try Try [Tory]. (Only £1 to be a Conservative chum!)


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Make My Dreams Come True (Axe Brown)

MacFrown, to counter claims of gregarious garbage gimmickism, has donned a Santa suit and urged Britons to "make the Britain of our dreams". Only minutes after the story broke on Telegraph, readers remarked of how we've already achieved a Britain of our nightmares.

Let's get writing to Ole Banter - pens at the ready, what would your dream Britain be?

Here's one I did earlier:

Dear MacFrown,

For this parliamentary session, could Banter please get me the following as TTG has not been so terrible so far this year.

1) A new premier
2) A new cabinet - one preferably with experience and expertise.
3) Brains for the Labour reps - they might then realise that the Labour Party is more of a joke than April Fools
4) A referendum (no amount of cover up on the EU protest last week, will stop us wanting a referendum, Banter)
5) Devolution to England? (Or is that asking too much? ;) )


Miss Terrible Tory Girl.

Oink! MPs In Money-For-Attendance Row

Apparently MPs aren't satisfied with their current trough rates and are now calling for money to turn up to the house on top of expenses and wage. TTG is not impressed in the slightest -why couldn't she be paid to get up at ungodly hours for class?

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