Campbell's Last Soup

Campbell’s Last Soup - Lark14:12-25a

Synopsis: The Almighty Ming prepares the Passover of Power


12 On the fifteenth day of October, when it was customary to sacrifice the Passover leader, Ming’s Imbeciles asked him “Where do you want us to go and make preparations for your Passover of power?”

13 So he sent two of his Imbeciles, Chris Huhne and Nick Clegg, telling them, “Go into parliament and a man holding the keys to number ten will meet you. Follow him.

14 Say to the owner of number ten, ‘The Almighty Ming asks: where is my new office, where I may do my Passover of power?’

15 He will show you a large office, furnished and ready, make preparations for my Passover of power there.”

16 The Imbeciles left, went into the city and found things just as the Almighty Ming had told them. So they prepared the Passover of Power.

17 When evening came, Ming arrived with 11 of his 29 cabinet members.

18 While they were reclining at the desk, reading the newspaper, Ming said, “I tell you the truth, one of us will betray the party – one in this room.”

19 The Imbeciles were saddened, and one by one they said to him, “Surely not I? "

20 “It is one of the twelve, “ he replied, “one who dips bread not in the Campbell bowl of soup but in another scotch broth.”

21 The Son of Runs will go quickly just as it is written about him in the tabloids. But woe to that man who betrays the Son of Runs! It would be better for him if he had not been torn politically.”

22 While they prepared the Passover, Ming took the party, gave thanks and broke it and gave it to his Disciples, saying, “Take it; this is my former party.”

23 Then he took the cup of Campbell’s soup, gave thanks and offered it to them, and they all drank from it.

24 “This is my blood of the new political covenant, which is poured out for the few, he said to them

25 “I tell you the truth, I will not drink again of the Campbell’s soup until that day when I drink it in the kingdom of Gordy.

25a “Verily I tell unto you that I have betrayed you Imbeciles. As you plotted a Passover of power from the very beginning, I too plotted. The Son Of Runs will rise again after three days in the Kingdom of Gordy.