Thursday, December 13, 2007

Spews On the Not So New News – December 13-14

Welcome to the Not So New Spews On The News, hosted by the terrible girl herself. In today's post, TTG looks at Ken, Vince, the Darwins and Leona Lewis.

Sois sage, readers!

1) Ken – the Scandal play set

Play Mayor Mogul in this limited edition Scandal play set. Ken, a shadow of his once dashing self, is now Mayor of London, England. Join Ken on his adventures in the capital as he squanders cash, gives over tax payer’s money to his business friends and defends bendy buses.

Set includes the following:

1) Real tax payers’ money
2) Ken – fully poseable in any direction
3) Introducing Ken’s friend Lee Jasper, who helps look after/spend (delete applicable) London’s money
4) Two newts to get your breeding going
5) Gold-plated Oyster card holder
6) Bendy bus and posable cross rail pieces – BIY – build it yourself, London
7) Olympic stadium – not available until 2012
8) Pretend food and sincerity.

Find out more here.

2) Vincey

TTG’s fan song for her favourite Dribberal.

A political parody of Mickey by Toni Basil.

Aye Vincey
You’ve been around all Shell,
And now here in the house,
You’ve been through parties well
Settling for the Liberal blouse,
Why can’t you be leader,
So you can rid of Broon, Vincey?

Cause when you suggested blue,
And teased Brown about bank Rock,
Your public support grew,
We wait for your next mock
Every PMQ we look out for you

Oh Vincey you’re so witty, you don’t understand
you take the public by the heart
when you hit Mr Broon’s hind,
Oh Vincey you’re not pretty
But you’ve got a solid mind
Its MPs like you Vincey,
Oh what you say Vincey,
Say Vincey,
Don’t break our faith Vincey.

3) Bleeding Hate

Yes, TTG has joined the herd of taste-less sheep and has that wicked, sinful, perhaps even morbid tune on her T-pod and she bleeding hates it. Especially when the tune happens to pop in Miss TTG’s head in most inappropriate places, namely humming it in a coroner court.

Leona Lewis, you should be ashamed - that silver shimmery dress will do just fine. Thanks.

4) Take a (Panama) break

TTG believes we can all learn from the money-borrowers, the Darwins – the way to survival is perhaps not in your genetics but in your purse.

We have all be fooled –TTG is more than happy enough to get on the bandwagon for this monetary bonanza.

While you’re swindling cash by the handful, remember firstly, Darwin would have wanted this, secondly, it was good enough for the Hood Robin, stealing from the rich and giving to the poor, er, in Panama.. and thirdly, insurance brokers make their living by grinding paupers into poverty and financial death.

TTG should fake her death more often….

PS. TTG would like to point out she is not glamorising stealing or promoting the perks of stealing from sneaky shark scoundrels. Not at all.


Nick said...

It’s truly diabolical how Ken and his thieving cohorts run this city. That they fail to run the city properly is bad enough – we have worse congestion than ever before (at least worse than I can remember in 25 years of commuting), the most expensive public transport system IN THE WORLD to the user which strangely still requires massive and increasing subsidy from taxpayers. But to learn that taxpayers’ money is not only being frittered away on his chums schemes, but also that there is little or no accountability for that taxpayers money beggars belief. Personally I believe that a lot of Ken’s popularity comes from the so called “free” events which he uses to boost his popularity. Note to Ken – there’s no such thing as a free event, what you mean is an event paid for by someone else (invariably unwillingly or unwittingly).

Still, overall a good week-end to be a Tory. 13 point lead in the polls is not to be sniffed at. Even the BBC has started to broadcast stories negative to Nu-Lab, though admittedly given the dearth of stories favourable to Labour they have little choice.

mark said...

Just found out about you last night and you sound great! Possible song parody- Oh Lee Jasper,where'd the cash go?We only want to know just where you put it all!
No it isn't cos you is black
It's cos we want to know just where you put it all!