Frocky Horror- A Not So Sweet Transvestite

Rocky Shocker: Mad doc Frank Furter (source: listverse.com)

Last night the local haunt for local homosexuals hosted its "gayest night ever" in the run-up to Yuletide.

Determined to outfancy dress her gay counterparts, TTG, the Straight and not so narrow Tory, set out in the wintry night in cult classic attire, as a "Sweet Transvestite."

In a turquoise surgeon shirt, complete with a pearl necklace, stockings, suspenders and afro curls, TTG stalked the church city's streets in an ensemble fit for Rocky Horror.

For that night only, TTG transformed into Fran N Furter, the sexual surgeon fou of the 70s, seen in teen screens and theatres alike.

An ardent fan of raiding the fancy dress cupboard, TTG pouted and hummed 'Time Warp' as she met both pals and odd looks en route to the club.


(For readers blind on the Rocky Horror Show, check out this wikipedia page.)

This home snap gives her readers faithful some idea of her (in)appropriate attire. The rest, TTG is sure can be left to their imagination.

As TTG and her masked partners, a certain Spartan soldier and a pre-transformation Superman, entered the club the trio had been tricked in their convictions that alkopoppers would follow the Girls And boYs night plans.

Slouched in jeans and sneakers, TTG for the second time this week was suspiciously overdressed or under-dressed as many punters pointed out.

Not only did TTG face a barrage of giggles at her expense, but also tickles, plays with her wig, pinches of her breast and derriere and plenty of ignorance of her alter ego.

Of all the places, TTG had expected the gay club to be a little recipient or in the know about Frank N Furter or even the definition of fancy dress.

So here, for the unoriginal unimaginative fools, here is what fancy dress entails:


fancy dress noun [U] UK "the special clothes that you wear for a party where everyone dresses as a particular type of character or thing."

One gay man approached me at the bar, sniggering at my whiter shade of pale painted face, said:"You have a lovely complexion. Peered at my stocking clad legs, he added "put it away love, it's disgusting."

Fed up with the jibes, TTG popped out to the bitter cold and stood amongst the smokers. But alas the attacks did not cease. A boyant bouncer enquired "where's the rest of your outfit, did it fall off?"

TTG's protests that Rocky Horror transexuals don't wear much else did not have much of an effect so she huddled back to the chime of cheesy tunes.

TTG's experience as a woman dressed as man dressing as a woman was not all so terrible.

She caught the eye of many a women, and the dialogue of 'you even got the right colour gloves' and 'fabulous' from the few who recognised this fancy dress feat.

To quote Wilfred Owen, "the old lie" - "Girls And boYs is canterbury's first dedicated gay and lesbian club night. It takes place every week at studio 41 in canterbury, and once a month a themed night is held."


Expenses of a Sweet Transvestite

Stockings, shoes and facepaint: Free
Wig: 8.99
Surgeon costume, using shirt as a dress 15.99
Orange spandex gloves 59p

Loss of dignity, sore feet and catching a cold while in the process of looking a complete twit: priceless

More pictures of the lady-man-lady of the night:

Fran N Furter's few groupies

TTG as a terrific transvestite