Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Spews On The News - November 27-28

Terrible Tory Girl is far too busy tearing her hair out theoretically and drooling sarcasm to rant. Here are the stories that have hit the newsstands.



1) Steady Teddy!

Terrible Tory Girl does wonder about these Sharians. Whipping for naming a teddy after the prophet? Surely He who cannot be named here would either be quite content that his followers slavishly aspire to follow his ways to a tee, even to his name.

(Objects like blogs aren't allowed to be named after the prophet - Tory Girl was hoping to have her blog go to heaven and take advantage of 72 blog virgins)

Religious men and women are but objects of faith, so surely the parents who chose to take their devotion that much further must face lashes too? That whip will be put to regular use in the UK alone - His name (and its 12 English variants) is the second most popular name for baby boys.

Just a thought.

Now where's that whip? Terrible Tory Girl is due for a lashing...

P.S. Out of interest, is this offensive? http://www.redmolotov.com/catalogue/design.php?design_code=muhammad



2) BNP riots

Terrible Tory Girl would like to point out the irony of the freedom of speech debate by the very two men, Irving and Griffin, forbade to freely speak about freedom of speech.

Freedom of speech at the Oxford event was postponed by socialist adversaries using their freedom of speech to attack the two men refused the freedom to speak about freedom of speech.

Meanwhile a BBC broadcast featured the protesters freely speaking against the debate but did not freely speak about the supporters of the freedom of speech debate who weren't allowed to freely speak about the freedom of speech debate.

Phew....that was too much freedom of speech to handle

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/oxfordshire/7114343.stm



3) Dragons Plan To Slay Jack

Terrible Tory Girl is not too devastated by Jack's sacking but does wonder whether the honey-union period ever happened. Why did they not put Wales' pet dragon in the flag, two hundred years earlier?

Perhaps in the draw-up they could cut out the blue stripes and include the green ones, the Sun proposed today, instead. It's a matter of time before Salmon reels out a civil war and we don't want to have 'braveheart' like colours ordaning our flag.

Another concern is that the government may be responsible for its design. We don't want another fellatio-looking creation nor in this case a Welshman fellated by a fellow sheep.

But designs aside, what would be the point to spill our gold on a piece of fabric? Terrible Tory Girl notes that the flag is hardly ever used unless in some PR stunt by Broon and she'd quite prefer Georgie to take his place in her parlour.



http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/11/27/nflag127.xml



4) RDMA - Recommended Daily Mutant Food Allowance

Terrible Tory Girl urges the government to make up its mind over its health policy. The latest propaganda is that GM food is good for you. Terrible Tory Girl wonders if Sainsbury's is handing them Gross Monetary to promote the crop known to stalk the aisles of the store.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/gmdebate/Story/0,,2217712,00.html


Twas all folks. The Terrible Tory is off to entice herself with demi-caffeinated coffee.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

1. I think a whipping can be provided.

2. That's given me a headache, far too much freedom of speech in there.

3. Civil war sounds like a good plan, I'll start preparing.

4. GM's always been good for you, how else are we to get mutant powers?