Going, going, gone....for Gold...

....The Gov give the athletes a run for their money.


Olympiorum finum - thank fuck!


Finally after the longest two weeks in history, the pro British farce has come to an end, with our top athletes (all dames and dukes you know) coming in at a measley 4th. By the constant politburo style propaganda, you would have thought Britain was topping the league but no, we suck, per usual.

The sad Brit flag anaraks aside, Brown and Boris made what should be a joyful experience for cynics like TTG into one from hell. Necking something strong before hitting the stage, Boris proclaimed "ping pong is coming home" before Brown, who had evidently gone too far in smuggling laughing gas, beamed like the Cheshire cat with a smile lined with slime and oozing with sleaze. Their little shacking up on the stage won the gold for cringeworthiness, with our disastrous stereotype cheese bus routine coming in at silver and Cuban taekwondo pro picking up the bronze for his kicking of the ref.

TTG is quite partial to that type of irony. Perhaps she could whack all the sad viewers of this terrible spectacle with her laptop before that gets stolen.

Puzzling TTG even more was the inclusion of pop tart Leona and David Beckham. Yes David is a footballer but last time TTG checked football wasn't an olympic event, it's not even a proper sport with the players kicking bags of money from one team pitch to another.

TTG supposes on the count of money that the Olympics is not much different-a contest to see who can waste the most dosh on a pointless exercise. In the immortal words of Ozzy-God bless- Osbourne, why pay a fortune when we can watch a man run around a track for free at the gym?

Gordy, this may have been your chance to get to your soapbox to pledge the wonder of Pro-Britain but isn't it funny how the big games to be hosted in our home hovel will not come out of every Briton's pockets, only those unlucky to live in the South East. Even Gordy won't have to pay for it, being in his native Scotchland. TTG bets thats why he is smiling so.

Your sadness makes him smile

SMILE - A song by Gordon to his public:

When you first left me I was wanting more
But you were voting that guy next door, what cha do that for (what cha do that for)
When you first left me I didn't know what to say
I never been on my own that way, just sat by myself all day

I was so lost back then
But with a little help from my Chinese friends
I found an Olympic light in the tunnel at the end
Now I'm calling you up on the phone
So you can have a little whine and a moan
And it's only because you're feeling alone

At first when I see you cry,
yeah it makes me smile, yeah it makes my smile
At worst I feel bad for a while,
but then I just smile I go ahead and smile

Whenever you see me you say that you want me back
And I tell you it don't mean jack, no it don't mean jack
I couldn't stop laughing, no I just couldn't help myself
See you messed up my mental health I was quite unwell

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Mrs DemenTed

Carol, stop making money out of your mother's name! We know Mrs T has dementia so stop snatching milk from the public cash cow. Go get lost in the jungle. What happened to respecting your parents? Journalists, eh? They'd sell their own mothers for a story. Or eat a bull's testacle...


MacDough-gal


So that explains why Brown was so quick to show his respect for the dead Dougal. He quite half fancied hushing the part where the late MP had wanted to sue the hell out of the gov for refusing to pay up compensation for the disease that killed him.

Why couldn't the gov pay up? They happily spend our money on Jags, flats, everything and the kitchen sink. Does a jag really mean more than a life?


Home Office Losers

43 laptops? 94 mobiles? Why on earth do we let out the House of Commons to such a bunch of losers?

Is this New Labour's latest policy to cut down on crime figures by er, "misplacing" the evidence?
They're not the smartest criminals TTG has seen. At least wipe the memory sticks or have a list of passwords, other than the mundrane password. Even block mobiles...

Whoops. Did TTG just give the gov ideas on how to rid of their incriminating stash?

It's strange they are having a real difficulty looking after their computers (just say no to taking them home with you). They didn't have a problem with rigging ballot papers, did they, eh?

More Spews on the News

TTG will be quick today, she has a lot to get through and still needs to get dolled up to trek on the tubey wubey.

Boz: Carpe Latinem

Boris has really excelled himself these past two weeks with a string of policies that might just work. First it was the ban on the drunks, next the gloves are on and Virgil is back on watch in school textbooks.

Perhaps when down with his kids in the sun, his babes crayoned some really useful ideas - ideas that suspiciously appear to contain elements of common sense. Did the bouffant blonde really concoct such wonders with his own two hands?

From one Juvenal to another, the notion of Latin back in the classroom, is a scary one for TTG. For seven years, her comprehensively torturous school, force fed Livy and Cicero, boring into her innermost skull, the dastardly declensions, mens-a, mens-o, ecce Romani, riddles written in a dead tongue.

Still it stopped TTG from hitting the streets and abusing others - she'd rather do that to the books and she did, often - scribbling on that bastard Vigil's head.

Latin is not picked for choice, it's picked to impress - to demonstrate survival of the fittest (you have only survived in life if you survived Latin)

Box-pop

Also in Bozzy's to-do-list is boxing class - another try to pent out the aggression of Lundun's youths. Well it didn't work for one infamous MP, who certainly has no RESPECT for his fellows. Why not instead set up in each gym, school and centre a de-cross room.

A room where pent-up people can throw to their heart's content, foam things at walls, at others' faces, where they can place pics of their bosses and staple paper penises to their heads or plunge scissors into their scalp.

Well TTG would pay to go- need she bring a picture of Brownie or do they have one in stock?

Little Bo-Weep

Boz steps down as MP in safely Tory seat, Henley. He shall be missed :(


Lost-their-witsSun

Cancelled. The Chrit festival has been axed off calendars and written off into obscurity and guess what, noone knew. Is that the latest Harbour (aka - Labour - always hangs around and is hated) policy to make bad, bad, bad decisions and not tell? Oh, hasn't that always been their held- hand -on-heart-on-sofa conduct of gov life? ;-)


EU-Ire-land

Ireland, Ireland, together....get to vote on the Lisbon Treaty on the 12th. Maybe TTG should put on her dodgy Irish accent and get to the voting booths....



Obama the Moon

As it says in the title, TTG has another electoral triumph notch to add to her bedpost - her fave man over the pond has been declared the democratic nominee. After 17 months of incessant coverage of the campaign, the colour of the candidates,low cash funds, and shameless celebs cashing in on the limelight, Obama faces next losing to the chip off the old block, McCain - the 'Nam man.
American democracy: working towards a lighter future

Take a tip from California

Dear Mr Brown, here is how to solve the terrible terror teething and immigration ires, click here for a policy that WILL work.

Regards,

Your biggest critic,

TTG

Spews on the News

TTG is back to your humble 'puter screens after run-ins with life (workies), hell (aka university grad arrangements), Morgan spice and a pinch of the past. (My first breaking story, in fact)

Here's this week's slightly skewed news, brought to you by one disgruntled blogger, mildly relieved by the sight of a Tory succession in the horizon.

One Fist Call

Released May 30, 2008 to all phone lines near you

Directed/acted/produced by Gordon Brown PM

Downing Street productions introduces for the first time since 1997 a feature length horror tale that'll leave the viewer breathless, grinding their nails to dust, and distressed to the grave.

The story follows the footsteps of voters viciously killed by a single phone call that tortures its victims by spinning off ceaseless verbal diahorrea lies that 24 hours or one Brown budget later, bores to their inner skull and kills them outright.

Each victim sucked soulless into the red calls is left motionless with Labour handouts in mouth.

One party is on Brown's tracks, Prepped and ready to stunt the smarm offensive Right in its tracks but can they reanimate life into a nation hit by the cold call phenomen for well over a decade?

Watch the trailer here:

Hung like a democracy

Serial shagger Clever Clegg has 'parently been pipped to become Home Sec. if the Totties win Top of the Chops in 2010. Despite the polls bending backwards to prove the Tories are top dogs with first Crewe, second, the refusal to immortalise LM (Lousy minister) Brown into wax in Tussauds and third, a whopping 24 per cent lead, Cameron isn't yet convinced.

While Cleggy may be happy to take over the job of parliamentary clown from the reformed Boris who has politically matured in his young reign of London, the move seems to cover Tory derrieres who wish not to bring out the fanfare until power is in their grasp.

Besides, does Broon really stand a chance of making up that loss over the next two years, without copping it at the finish line?

TTG doubts profusely that Things Can Only Get Better in the demise and fall of the flying Scotsman.

Read all about it here.


London Blunderground

Poor BOJO has lost his MOJO (Mayoral opalescence and judicious organisation) and faces more than a telling off after drunkard pranksters stuck up two glasses at the Mayor by boozing on the thin yellow line.

Part of a facebook protest the Last Round ended in attacks on drivers, cops and TFL staff before it drew to a hazy end.

A twist in the ale, was er, that unions now believe Boris, the man behind the can ban on tubes, should apologise for their behaviour.

Last time TTG checked, Boris was the Mayor, a glorified overseer of the London construction site, filled with free-thinking individuals who make and take their own actions and should pay the consequences. BOJO is no more responsible for their actions than say, the newsagents and off-licences who sold off the booze to the protesters.

Why not, unions, blame the disgustingly behaved drunks who savagely hit the staff in their line of work for their OWN behaviour? Novel idea, eh?

Lem's Bit of Cheeky: Don't Touch my Bum!

Gabriela, the other half of the misfit Cheeky Girls pop outfit, has gained entry into the Commons after apparently needing a refuge from "adoring fans". It wouldn't have anything to do with that her fiance is the Lib Dem MP Opik and that the Romanian may face deportation.

Maybe, just maybe, Opik has an autobiography in the pipeline and hopes to secure a headline screamer of 'we had sex in the Commons chamber'. Or 'Third date at the Commons tops a day at the Science Museum says Gabriela.'

Well it sounds far more plausible than the notion that she's escaping fans - were there ever any real fans or were their fan base just hair-receding men in their 70s poised to vote for two twins in matching mini shorts?

Make up your mind by watching this vid.

Spews on the News

TTG is back baby, bruised and battered from the one month long war of pen and paper with the Tory tyrant Winston Churchill. Apologies for her delay - feel free to heckle the terrible girl as much as you see fit. Promises to update sooner.



Sick of the one-man clown show and his circus freaks that have helped themselves to residence in the Commons, TTG proposes a plan, a very dastardly yet democratic plan.

For those who missed out on voting in Mayor elections, locals or were refused vote when Brown gave up election last Oct, here's your chance to vote - simply download the form below and cross next to the name you want to vote OUT.

Cross as many as one or all against the names of the Crapnit you feel deserve to be booted out promptly. Psst, cross all - they're all useless, TTG says, in a non-partisan, Tory leaning way. Ahem.

Get your form via TTGmail.

Cherie: My Story in helping bulimics everywhere

Hearing the men and women who work hard (or not so hard, as is ALWAYS the case) for you, panting their sexual exploits and spilling it out on paper is akin to your parents seating you in the front room and forcing you, eyes pegged open, to watch them mimicking rabbits. No thanks.

Lord, if you can hear this plea, could you please stop politicians or their PAGS (Prostitutes and groucho-luvvies) from telling all about their sex life- it makes TTG feel bulimic. *bleurrgghhhh* Actually TTG does feel that models, keen to lose a stone to fit in their -12 tissue length dresses, could do well to pick up Cherie's or John's books. If it has that effect on TTG, what wonders for the clothes peg world.

For those who have had the pleasant fortune to not have heard about Cherie and her 4 time a nighter Tony in the sack, here's an idea of what to expect.

Try something new, try the all new Balmoral position, subject to condition that you must f*** the Royals rather than screw the public.

How to do a Balmoral in three easy steps

1) Take a leaf out of Prescott's book and leave respect, dignity, taste at the door, preferably leaving it open so royals, world and poor servants can see.

2) Depending on the circumstances, f*** over the royals either by assuming the conceive position * in view of a Royal or by taking the Royal Crescent and inserting, head first or whatever is preferable, up anus. Repeat several times.

3) While in position, scribble your memoirs on wads of cash lying around the room, and after Four times Tone has come to a standstill, phone Mandelson or Campbell to bring in cotton buds to insert socialist spawn in womb.

Congratulations, you are one step away from being like Cherie: a money honey.


* (that's the one where you don leather court wigs and red leather pvc robes, lie on sheets made out of public cash, extend legs in the air while Tony reaches in with 'matrix masseuse Carole giving her hand by throwing bottles of new age holy (s***) water cos they are Catholic of course, before tantric chanting of "please Satan, just another million more.")

Saving the animals, save the clothes

Calling all animals, shed your clothes, don a mask and raise money for the endangered across the world. The Duckworth Project, an art concept which sees bidding animal activists strip to save creatures great and small, promises to give all proceeds to charities worldwide.

So what you waiting for? Check out the page here and get that mask pronto. Tis art.

* Darling dud of May

Should I repay or should they go...to hell? The Darling of the Treasury simply can't make his mind up these days.
First he endorses binning the 10p tax despite the workers, the breadbone of the party affected by this decision, then he says he'll make it up to them in blood cash and next he toys with the idea of scrapping the removal of the tax altogether.
TTG understands how difficult it is at this time with Ginny Gordon not around to dictate money policy but surely he knew he was on to a loser when it was revealed that the real workers would lose out, even more than usual?
Labour, eh, who'd have 'em? ...Er only in Britain....

Attempt to get your head around tax here.

*Off-your-Facebook

Following Major Bojo's idea to ban the booze on the cattle train, some serial hop-ers on facebook (i.e Strongbow students) have planned a protest to go round and round in a circle (a bit like what the Gov does at the moment), er, train, getting pissed on cheap bottles of wine and Lambrini. Only one problem as supporters point out - tisn't yet illegal and won't be til next year.
A fine is hardly a step towards martyrdom. Back to the er boozing, er, TTG, means drawing board.

*Johnson & Johnson

Keen to get their same named main man into fame and the pm frame, the Sabre toothless lot in the rosette HQ apparently reckon Alan Johnson, Sec. for health is the man for the job. Lean, mean and more of a joke than Bojo, Johnson stands a pretty chance of becoming the next successor that is even more pathetic than his predecessor - even more so than the Frown-Bliar partnership.

TTG wonders who'd win in the potential 2014/5 fight, Johnson or Johnson? Hmm but where would the cosmetics company stand in all this?

Border-line humour

After Ken traded his missing Bojo back in April with a kid's monster book called 'Calm down, Boris' TTG decided to check the little book out at the bookworm chain, Borders.

Bordering on giggles, TTG spotted the five-page book complete with poseable hand puppet Boris monster, in the biography section of the store. After sticking her hand into Boris to grant kisses to her pal, girlaboutlondoncity.blogspot.com, she found a little synopsis that sums up London's frolic fave on amazon.

"Meet Boris - he's a very loving little monster! Orange, hairy and over-enthusiastic, Boris means well, but always ends up getting carried away and spoiling things. In "Calm Down, Boris!", the reader is asked to help Boris brush his hair ready for his trip to the park - and gets smothered in grateful kisses. The same happens when we feed him, and when he gets to the park none of the other little monsters want to play with him because he's so loud and boisterous. But when a big scary dog jumps over the fence, Boris saves the day by scaring him away with his big, friendly kisses!"


Buy the book here.

Spews on the News May 6

Save the Whale

Talksport, the radio station that er talks sport, mostly, has its fair share of controcool figures, past and present, ranging from oh Hallow-aye, Gaunty and James Whale.

Although thanks to some three PC slimy Ken kindlers, the great Whale, a known right ringer, has been forced to quit his post on the grounds of impartiality.

And his charge? 'Vote Boris'. The Beeb, allegedly apolitical, is full to its biased brim of Labour luvvies who between each breath and word gush to the scowling scoundrels on the front bench. Why aren't those horrendously-payed hacks sacked under this same guiding principle?

Talksport bosses, you should be ashamed of yourself. Even radio stars have the right of freedom of expression and you knew what was in store when you picked him to host.

Save the Whale!

Visit here to leave your messages of support.

And here for that news story in full.



Turn Back Crime

Since the revelation that Bonkers-bonking mad crime buster Boris is desperate to try on the premier crown, TTG has a funny feeling she has seen it all before....

For Boris is:

Ambitious
Smart
Journalist
Author
American connections
One time social democrat
Historian
Aristocratic roots
Witty
Gaffe-a-minute
Lion-heart courage

Surely it couldn't be.......Winston!

Cripes. But how? There are three well-thought out, equally insane explanations below.

1) Is Boris the result of Winston wanting to leave his mark on history?
2) Is Winston alive in Boris, like in that Disney flick, the Lion King?
3) Is Winston really alive but who bought a blonde floppy wig, went to the plastic surgeon and got a name swop? Or is his charming new looks down to the good ole men at the secret services who reconstructed him with the help of L'oreal's deep-set wrinkle serum? - Makes you look ten years younger apparently.

Post your thoughts, conspiracies below on their uncanny resemblance to one another.




Hillary sprints on to beat Barack's polls

Surprise, surprise, America to choose Hillary as democrat dirigeant after her position in the polls surged suddenly when they realised they may vote in, quel horreur, the unaccepted.

Hillary now boasts 51 per cent, a 7 per cent lead since two weeks before when Obama was flying high to electoral earnings, with a 12 point lead on his Clinton rivale.

Still, TTG, will pledge to support Obama, even if the Yankee Doodles play the safe card.

Read all about it here.


Build it up with bricks and more, ta

In a bid to beat the Canard* boffins who built a tower reaching 96 feet, Britons got their lego bricks and set to work to create a tower mast four feet higher, at (pronounced) Leegoland, Windsor.

TTG doesn't know about you but she's very surprised our fiends at the PC office haven't come knocking to put red tape around the mast since kiddies might swallow the bricks, stick them in their ears, or heaven forbid put them on an 100 ft high tower that could splat a child.

Although the tower does resemble more the tower of Pisa than a mast judging by this pic she stole off the BBC website.



News story here.


*Canadians

Politics has gone to the dogs

Since TTG hasn't learnt how to yet post vids, click below to see Boris as you have never before. Brought to you by the rib tickler folk at Headcases.


It's A Dog's Life


Here's a screen shot - that's as far as TTG dares to venture in the techno land.

Good-Eye of Newt

TTG's terribly Tory gang have never had it so good. In this week alone, they've thwarted red-top politics in the land of the sheep, knocking Labour from their political pedestals in four seats. They kept their hold on to nearly 50 seats across England, set up twelve Tory camps in the councils and boasted new 256 Conserve councillors. All in a day's work. "Hyperactive politics", Gordy? Hardly.

But the Tors had their cake, ate it too with a cherry on the top, when Boris, the Toryman with one swift blow knocked King Ken out of the ring and became 2008's heavyweight Mayor of the capital.

In other news, Boris will have to spend thousands to remove the slimy, sticky residue left on Eyeball hall by a certain Mr Newt Dyingstone.

The work is not yet done. We must not stop short of our long held aim - to enter number ten and give the public a government that is compassionate, fair, and conscientious of the desires, wills, wants and needs of its people.

Only with Cameron and his cabinet can England survive.

This is the Tory mantra, given to you for the forgiveness of sins that you once voted those slimy Labour snakes in, do this in remembrance that the Tories are good for you.

In the immortal words of the Churchillian chugger of cigars and booze, the Right Honoured Winston Churchill in 'his blood, tears and sweat' speech in 1940:


"We shall fight Labour on the seas and oceans,
we shall fight Labour with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be,
we shall fight Labour on the beaches,
we shall fight Labour on the landing grounds,
we shall fight Labour in the fields and in the streets,
we shall fight Labour in the hills;
we shall never surrender."


Here's how London voted (According to wiki - approach with skepticism)

London Mayoral Election Results 2008
	Name	Party	1st Preference Votes	%	2nd Preference Votes¹	%	Final	%²
	Boris Johnson	Conservative	1,043,761	42.48	124,977		1,168,738	53.2
	Ken Livingstone	Labour	893,877	36.38	135,089		1,028,966	46.8
	Brian Paddick	Liberal Democrat	236,685	9.63	N/A
	Siân Berry	Green	77,374	3.15	N/A
	Richard Barnbrook	British National Party	69,710	2.84	N/A
	Alan Craig	Christian Peoples Alliance	39,249	1.6	N/A
	Gerard Batten	UKIP	22,422	0.91	N/A
	Lindsey German	Left List	16,796	0.68	N/A
	Matt O'Connor	English Democrats (withdrawn)	10,695	0.44	N/A
	Winston McKenzie	Independent	5,389	0.22	N/A

For more on the results, click here.

Well done Boris, now is your chance to twinkle, our bright blue star, and demonstrate just why one million Londoners were right to entrust their franchise in you.

*Gordy, the cab's waiting. Why don't you too join ole Kenny in the 'political wilderness'

-The Polls never lie.

Voting Out Ken For A Hero

Voting out Ken for a hero - A song tribute to the man we should all cross for our next Mayor. Make the Right choice, vote the bouffant Boris.

Besides gentlemen prefer blondes.

Sing along to the song, Voting out Ken for a hero, which sounds so very similar to Bonnie Ty's Holding out for a hero....uncanny.


Voting out Ken for a hero


Where have all the bad men gone
And where are all the quods?*
Where's the safe street Boricules
to fight the thieving squads?

Isn't there a blue knight upon a routemaster bus?
Late at night I toss and turn and yearn
of what I trust

We need Boris,
We're voting out Ken for a hero not for a fright,
He's gotta be blue
And he cannot be last
And he's gotta be fresh, not a krait.**
We need Boris
We're voting out Ken for a hero, not an anti-semite
He gotta be our cure,
and sing a new tune,
And he's gotta be larger than life.

Somewhere after poll night,
in my wildest fantasy,
somewhere in his maiden speech,
Boris won't be breaching our decree,
Racing on no blunder and not rising with cheat,
it's gonna take a Toryman to make me walk my street.

(Chorus)

Up where City hall meets bureaucracy from above,
out where there's splits in the Assembly,
I would swear that there's a suitable mayor,
Boris is he!


Through the wind end the chill and the rain
And the crowd and the crud,
I can feel his blue vote,
cross the box, it's no dud.

(Chorus)

*Quod - jail
**Krait - poisonous snake

Vote Boris and click here to see why.

Sing a long to the tune here

* P.S. Here's who TTG voted for

Mayor choice 1: Boris Johnson
Mayor choice 2: Matt O Connor (English Democrats)
London Assembly (East and City) - Phillip Briscoe (Conservative)
London Assembly (London-wide) - Christian Alliance

If you have any questions on why TTG voted in this way or complaints that she didn't instead help vote back in red Ken or his comradry, please do leave a message here.

Spews on the News April 2- 4

Guess who's back, back again, TTG's back, tell a friend

Welcome to this week's edition of the incredibly popular* Spews on the news.

With the past few days spent catching up on Allo Allo, dreaming and heading brave and brazen to this year's first Rocky Horror Picture Show singalong feature at Prince Charles, TTG has been all but preoccupied to sit and rant.

Back to her typical Tory tricks, TTG is again a fully fledged supporter of all things Conservative after a truly terrible 12 hour stint as a Labour luvvy for April's Fools. TTG wonders how the real rose clad clan cope for 365 days a year - perhaps hypnotism or subliminal messages in their broadcasts?

TTG would also like to take the time to apologise sincerely for falsely attributing Gordon Brown as a dreamboat in her last post. We, all of course, know such endearments referred to that particular Scowling Scot from the Westminster Loch network, are definitely defamatory - let's just stick to the basic insults as they at least have some truth to them.

Comme d'habitude on this terrible blog, here is the news, mostly read with provocation against the Non-Labour party. Amusez-vous, vous wont'cha?

Don't Mention The Queen

Vincie Cable, TTG's once preferred choice for the Liberal leadership, has been slammed by the Jurassics in the Labour Party for daring to mention the Queen's name. Michael Martin, the state's cash seeker, refused to allow Cable to ask the question that is currently doing the rounds in public life -

"It was reported this week that Her Majesty the Queen had cancelled her diamond wedding celebrations because it was judged to be inappropriate to engage in extravagance at a time of economic gloom and recession.
Do you share my view that this demonstrates Her Majesty's unerring instincts for the public mood, or does the Government think she was overreacting?"

Perhaps the wording was a little off, as of course one must never bring one into parliamentary debates but Cable raises a very valid point - if the Queen is rationing her lux life because she feels Britain's at an economic bust, then surely there is indeed a real economic crisis on the cards, n'est-ce pas?

But of course Labour, its languish luvvies and its 'ites have for years proclaimed the Messianic message of the enviable English economy while hushing-up the patrie's poverty by bringing in immigrant forces to vote in their favour. And adding to that, a national force feed of the policy of political correctness, the principle of censure through fear of insult.

Today, they exerted the hand of hush by refusing to answer the question on the basis of mentioning the word, Queen. In this logic, would Mr Speaker refuse these questions?

1) "What does the Government plan to do to ameliorate the impoverish and discriminate conditions of transvestites such as queen Bob Monkton in my constituency?

2) The Government cites that their economy record has grown steadily and not yet dipped after ten years of Labour in the driving seat. And am I the Queen of Sheba?

Sillyness aside, surely the fact that the Queen has publicly moved herself and her influence into the political sphere, then isn't it a sign that the Sovereign has modelled into a political rather than public figure? Thus, it should be legit to discuss her political actions if she chooses to stand in the political limelight.

Vincie, TTG sees your point.

The Pest Of Friends: Boris Wins BNP Vote

A bombshell this week for blonde bomb MP, Boris Johnson & Johnson. As he launched his Mayor Campaign officially, much to his dismay, the Bigot Nationalist Party have pledged their far-right hand in support of him, urging their own (hopefully very few) voters to cross their names next to him for their second vote.

Andrew Grice on his bloggy on the Independent website quoted the BNP crew-cut clan saying "In this race, the Tory clown Johnson is a lesser evil than the Marxist crank Livingstone," the BNP says, "so replacing the latter with the former would, on balance, be an improvement for the majority of Londoners."

D'oh just what every Tory does not need. Grice, however, in his write-up of the story, made an inlaudable claim that the Green Party "is much more respectable".
While TTG despises the bigots on the right, praising the Green Party is a stroke too far - considering that half of their vote demographic includes new-age-carrot-crunching-rhubarb-munching-green-peace-organic-eco-freak-hippies.
The Green Giants (certainly not in vote counts) are made worse still by their support of the anti-Semite- hypocrite-Livingmoan.

Serial Booker To Ferial Hooker

This was the Oxford smartie who went to university at 13, and gave up the books and brains for looks and monetary gains. It seems that intelligence just doesn't pay and it doesn't take a prodigy to work out that £130 an hour, laying on back, is far better than hitting dust-cladden books for a significantly inferior sum. For Sufiah Yusof, money can buy her love ;)


The Peckham Order: Harriet-No-Harm-Man In Vest Row

TTG, like most, would not like to hear about the goings on on Peckham's own Iscariot Harriet's chest. But the fact that a city's MP chooses to gear up in stab proof attire to visit her own constituency is a complete and utter joke.
Apparently she donned the tight fitting anti-stab top because the police told her to. She later compared the vest to wearing a builder's hat on a building sight or an Indian wearing a turban when er visiting some Indian event, apparently. Logical, she ain't.

One response from a Peckham resident made the point more strongly, suggesting that if she doesn't feel safe, why not represent a place like Chelsea?

Here's the quick reference guide to what happened when Harry Met Haguey, taken from the good people at London Lite

1)"Hague joked that if Harman dresses appropriately when she goes a a building site or a factory, "presumably when she goes to a cabinet meeting she goes dressed as a clown." 2) Harman said that if she needed advice on what to wear, "the very last person I'll look to for advice is the man in a baseball cap".

3)Hague added "If she thinks her constituents will kill her, she should look behind her."

Goodbye for now, TTG is off to count kittens and dream about Tim Curry in drag. Mmm

*Readership tallied on TTG's one hand