Parl' wars: Attack of the clones

Crash Gordon

The fleet street sheep have finally left Gordy to graze on greener pastures in the Cameron camp.

As the Unions plead for an end to the No Labour faction, papers from the G. Mail to the Gordygraph and even to the Dependant have hung up their pens in protest in the face of a future of writing the impossible: Pro-Broon puffs.

The Guardian are no longer faithful angels, seated up left, if this blog post by Bridget Fox is anything to go by.

Doctor of the daily Wail, or Gmail, Dacre, has made a Right move, and now backs Cameron after his brief fling with "walking on water Brown" ended in tears.

The Dependent too has packed up it's individualistic rag to check out the Tory that's setting the public papers' hearts on flame.

Gordygraph, even under its recent Sinistrum yoke, has revoked its left wing dalliances.

His Scotch compatriots are not sending out an SOS for him, particularly not the Scotland on Sunday.

Rowan, the Lambeth fly trap, the man who launched a thousand debates over his Sh'ite talk on Sharia law, has stood by his Lord rather than er Gord.

Rather than to divide the Church so that Gordy and his political poachers may walk Scot-free, he has decided to turn the other cheek and blow a raspberry at the pm by his attempt to solder the falling pieces of church back together again.

And the Unions? United against Brown.

But, don't worry pet, you have one Unusual suspect you can count on for support.

....

Your Tory tea chum, Maggie T.

Is your time up too, Brown? Is your state funeral in the wake of 2010?

Brown Walks On Water - Daily Mail Exclusive

WARNING: Adversaries of Broon are urged to shield their eyes from this nauseatingly vile script printed in Wednesday, August 15th's Mail, page 12

What you are about to see is not faked, but the exact words that I, as a sworn troublemaker, decided to send to the Daily Mail after they produced this comment that screams of "love affair" and has the potential to envomit even mild Tories

"Hyperactive Downing Street is these days truly a wonder to behold. Floods? Brown's your man. Foot-and-mouth? He's in charge. Terrorist attack? There he is again. As for his summer holiday, isn't four hours quite enough?Then the piece de resistance. Miraculously, he managed to keep nearly £40billion in his back pocket while he was Chancellor - money that now allows him to display Prime Ministerial munificence with a huge spending splurge.All this in just seven weeks. How long before he starts walking on water? "

Please pardon me while I recycle my breakfast.

Sorry to burst your little bubble, dear Mail, but he is PM - that's his job!

And here folks is my response:A letter to the Mail

Dear editor - just a quick query, is Gordon Brown in fact the paper's new editor?

With the amount of bias in favour of our new PM, I am pretty sure that the departure from the right to an editorial line that is frankly left-leaning, is written by Broon himself.

Maybe with this now constant Brown drivel that appears in the comment every day, you may as well rename the paper the Daily Brown or more aptly the Daily Fail.

This new experiment will cost you more than just paper sales but devoted readers who turned to the Mail, believed to be representing their interests.I have corresponded with the Mail before when you chose for your splash to have a column by the former chancellor on caring.

Printing politicians' viewpoints is not really appropriate considering that this particular man of politics was second only to Tony Blair and was deemed to be the next PM, which now has been realised.

It was worse, even still, when the Express revealed the next day that Brown was blocking moves to help support carers, who only a day before had praised and pledged his hand for these “saints.”

Yesterday's paper demonstrated the level the Mail is willing to reach to keep up in this bias. On the revelation that Brown had pocketed £40 billion of taxpayers' money for his forthcoming election campaign just before parliament closed for the summer, the Mail ran a comment praising his “hyperactive government” and how he saved 40 billion and "when will he be walking on water?"

Sorry to break your rather skewed image of Brown but this man has robbed from pensioners, taxed citizens to the hilt - and these stories come from none other than your paper in the past.

You have a responsibility as a paper, despite freedom of press, to educate and tell your readership the news of the day and ultimately the truth.

If you cannot even manage that, with your school girl like obsession with wonder boy Broon, then you should not be in the newspaper business, but in the government.